Well, I had no idea there. Mmm... actually I wanted to say Mantra-ray but *lol* I forgot it at the moment. Anyway, I think I'm more proper to be an iguana than salamander. Lol. I love to camouflage and act wherever I am. Hahaha no! Of course! Im kidding. If you see me green in the class, you'll see me green too in the street. I always try to be the person who is called Gomat, it's kinda process until you stop to dream a shape of a person whose nose is longer than you, or friends are more than you, or skin is brighter than you... or Trigonometry's score is higher than you.
They aren't you. That's the main problem! Why should you try to be like them? Well, to get much friends? To be praised? To make yourself feel better?
I can't suggest anything. But let's see from my point of view, if you don't mind, lol.
What was the Lord's aim when It started to think about creating a species called human? To be a leader in this tiny Earth, eh?
Then, what was Its aim when It decided to make Adam and Eve's children grow up in different kind of skin, eyes, hair...? Quran has answered, but I think Lord wants us to feel unmonotonous, beside to appeciate its own diversity.
So why should you similize yourself to be him, or her?
When I was in an elementary, I had a friend who was so kind, and we were bestie. We had the same interest, same favorite comics, movies, TV program, anime characters, and topic to be talked about. We reached good scores there at school, together. At first semester of 3rd grade, I was in 7th rank and he's in 6th. The next semester we exchanged, so I was in 6th and he's 7th. Lol.
We stick together until I felt it was so good, about that friendship, and I started to do some imitation of his habits. So dumb. I copied the way he talked, I followed how he walked, I laughed when he did so, I burped after drank a water, just like what he did. And else.
You know? Those made me looked like his slave then. People saw me as a second after him, that was really "good", because finally someone got him closer and shoved me out from that silly circle. I was alone. No friend. Zero topic.
I got nothing but knew about what people thought about me: a silent dumb, a silly drawer, a nothing-to-see person, and a who-cares-if-he-swallowed-by-earth person. Were that good, eh?
It was getting worse in 5th grade. A poor Gomat. I had a looong time to understand how pity I was. How naive I was so people could walk through me as they didn't know I watched them jealously.
At the end of 5th grade, I said to myself to end all of this. It would get me to the worst if I stood like that, bad habit, bad thoughts. Well, at the final grade of elementary (6th grade) I was so better than my long old past. I've decided to bury it down, bye...
I made new friendship with my oldest friend, he's a person whom I met in 2nd grade, and we did more silly things after it. So it was cheering me. I stopped to copy him, or her, or anybody else. Coz being myself is the most suitable way for me to live my own silly life, I think.
I passed that year with lots of fun, although sometime I still saw them, and at the moment, I wanna said, "hey you two, you don't have to look at me. Besides, we're nothing, eh?"
Graduation came... and I got my best thing I've ever wondered. No. I didn't called to walk to the stage as a best alumnus or something, but I could see my own self as a new people who would walk in the new junior hi-school and started all over from... nothing. And it was fun coz I told it to my bestie (he would go to the same junior hi-school) and he agreed all the way. "Here we go."
Three years of living in junior hi-school seemed so fast, I still used that mindset, to be myself and my own self, and everything changed. I got better to them, as we grew up from an elementary child to pre-teenagers and thought, "hey that was the past, nothing's gonna happen now if we're being a friend, eh?"
I said that it wasn't problem and we're sticking together until now, with some new friends whom I met in junior hi-school. And the most incredible thing I've ever had is I got the "best alumnus" title there. And I went to this senior hi-school to continue my silly life.
Rrrrr... I made the same mistake again, here, in 10th grade, so it wasn't a good year for me, and in the end I was so depressed coz I hardly failed to reach an education program which called IPA, *you should know it, eh?* but I got a chance if I wanted. OF COURSE I WANTED IT, SILLY BRAIN. I should study hard to Physics and Math exam, and voila! Lord gave me the chance.
I try not to waste it. So, as it has written in many places, we should be grateful and give a thanks to the Almighty, and else... but for me, the best way to say thanks to It, is to be myself. It has created us to be like this, so go on, accept it, know it.
Who will understand your mind, if you ain't do that? So start to appreciate it, you won't know when is it gonna blow up and how ace you are, if you ignore yourself?
*I ain't talking as an ace or smartass psychologist here, it's just a little piece of what I've learned... and I think you should know :)
